Andy Rooney, meh

Andy Rooney has retired from 60 Mintutes. He says he will continue writing, and is not looking forward to death. I see this as an opportunity. I like to complain about stuff. Maybe this is my chance to make it big! Let's give this a whirl.

Did you ever notice how crazy Andy Rooney's eyebrows are? There are wild, crazy hairs going every which way. Sometimes I wonder how he can see. Perhaps this is why he is so grumpy all of the time, and gets upset over the crap people have in their glove boxes.

Women often have their eyebrows groomed. Sometimes they have brows that are thin and highly arched.  Greta Garbo comes to mind. Wasn't it a trend to keep them thicker and plusher? Brook Shields had great brows.

I've heard that some women draw in their brows. They either plucked them too much, or have chosen to shave them off. Why would anyone want to shave off their eyebrows. Anyway, I guess there are stencils to help them. That way they can change how they want to come across to the world for the day. Surprised, sad, based on the stencil and the placement of their brows. It all seems a bit weird if you ask me.

I am told the uni-brow should be avoided. Frieda Kahlo had a famous uni-brow. She seemed to do all right.

Recently men have become concerned with their eyebrows. They go to salons to have them waxed and tweezed. I had a friend once tell me you tweeze your brows, and pluck a chicken. My mom always said she plucked her eyebrows. I've heard you can also use sugar instead of the wax. It's supposed to be better than wax because it doesn't have to be heated up as much. I'll keep the sugar for my morning coffee.

Some guys have brows that would look better on a woman. I guess this makes sense if they do drag. I think a guy should have guy eyebrows. My barber asks if I want mine trimmed when I go for a haircut. My eyebrows grow faster than the hair on my head as I get older. 

Finally, there is this way of keeping your eyebrows looking good called threading. Seems painful. Thread should be used to sew buttons on your shirt, not pull hair out of your face. 

Eyebrows are important. They keep water out of your eyes, and they help express how you are feeling. People who have too much Botox can't move their eyebrows. I like to move mine. So, for now I will let my barber keep mine in check, because I never want mine to look like Andy's!